Ways of Permanent Love – Half of the couples, dating or marrying today will fall out of love and end in divorce. You don’t want your relationship to go down that road. What ways can current generation take to create permanent love? Divorce was the last resort in the past. It is no secret couples celebrated, twenty-fifth, forty-fifth, and fiftieth wedding anniversaries.
Psychologist, Dr. Judith S. Wallerstein, co-author of “The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts,” identified eight “psychological tasks,” as the foundation of marital relationship. Marriage doesn’t just happen. It starts with falling in love, cultivating relationship and climaxes in “happily ever after.” You work at it.
You want to know ways of permanent love. Take a look at seven ways outline in Dr. Wallerstein research study outcome.
Isolate Emotion from Reality.
There is a thin dividing line that is not noticeable where emotion ends and reality does takes over in relationship. Drawing imaginary line over feelings in relationships is difficult but not impossible. Whether you’re starting out in a new relationship, dating or married, the secret weapon to use is to isolate emotion from reality and invest in the relationship. How do you do that?
Redefine your priorities and lines of connectivity with the partner. Evaluate your past in relation to the present and anticipation of the future. The two of you didn’t meet and poof, the relationship blossomed. Strong relationship foundation is a gradual process. You both work to build it up with a lot of give and take.
Identify Matters of Mutual Interest
Lisa can’t stand the bad boy Kate is dating. He’s unreliable and too much in love with himself.
“There’s nothing wrong with sweet, gently and kind men,” Lisa adds.
“That is the kind of man that you grow old with,” she further explains. No two relationships are the same. What works for Lisa does not work for Kate. That doesn’t mean Kate or Lisa’s relationship is superior. The same is true with yours.
You share a lot in common. That is the glue that holds the relationship together. You share intimacy based on trust from clear conscience. You’re also unique individuals with different temperaments, drives and aspirations in life. Unique individuality sets you apart, marks individual boundaries, independence and protection in the relationship.
You’re in this relationship together. That requires harmony to pull it off. You encourage one another by knowing and emphasizing on strengths and supporting the partner in areas of weakness. Your partner is a go getter.
Establish a healthy relationship.
Encourage one another to face challenges at the work place, from extended family members. Partners in relationships have moments of ups and downs. You need each other during the highs and lows in life.
Culture required a woman to engage in unending house chores in the past. A lot has changed. Women are running offices, businesses and homes. A woman gets tired and could use a man’s helping hand to make life comfortable in the home through establishment of a vibrant relationship.
Practice Unconditional Love
When you love someone, you want only the best for the person. Let’s face it. Love is juicy the first few months of exquisite romance in the relationship. Maintaining the status is next to impossible in a marriage relationship, unless you make time for it.
Reality sets in, and love is the first thing that goes through the window into the garbage bin. How do you maintain the flame of love that brought you together as partners in the relationship?
Recall those moments when you couldn’t wait to roll into each other arms in the initial stages. You remember how special you held one another in high esteem. You can jumpstart relationship love life by salvaging the past moments of unconditional love.
Confront challenges life throws at you as a team.
You’ve got each other to lean on for support and encouragement to face everyday challenges.
There’s constructive and destructive criticism. Relationships could do with less destructive criticism. Build on the power of praise to strengthen the foundation of your relationship. You used to compliment your partner on her dressing.
“You look exceptionally stunning in that dress.” What has made the sudden change in remarks to?
“What did that thing cost?” That is a killjoy statement. How often do you wake up next to your spouse and feel like you’d die if you spend another day with him/her. The man’s snoring habit keeps you awake the whole night. His idea of romance is now dead and buried. All he ever talks about is work. Love wears thin and out fast in most relationships unless you make time and put in effort to confront problems in life as a team.
Nurture and Comfort One Another.
It is not so much what each of one of you does to build the relationship as it is the attitude attached to the deed. Preparing meals for your partner out of love frees him/her to take on other responsibility is a sign of mutual esteem.
In times of sickness, your partner takes on roles to ensure you’re comfortable and taken care of. You don’t go out of the way to employ house help to do house chores in the event your female partner in the relationship falls sick. You jump right in and manage house chores. That is what partnership is all about.
You can’t run away from roles and responsibilities in relationships. You work at them to nurture and comfort one another. There are no perfect partners, only perfect strangers in relationships and your case is no exception to rules governing relationships. Where does that leave you?
Keep Romantic Relationship Alive
Visualize images of falling in love as you face each new day with renewed enthusiasm to seek ways of making your love relationship permanent.
A woman’s principle role in the relationship is support so that the man is liberated to perform his duties satisfactorily. Roles in relationships contribute to building a solid foundation and mutual trust between the two partners.